On the Road

The white stripes passed beneath his dangling arm at a furious pace. Wind from the friction caused by speed blew hot on his face through the lowered window. At the time, he wasn't sure which was faster; the beat of the pistons or his pounding pulse. He brought in his left hand to take the wheel so that his right could twist the radio knobs. When a firm signal was found, Jude cranked the volume. He hoped to drive the angry voices out of his mind and drown out the noisy blast of the wind.
"I can't stand this indecision, married with a lack of vision. Everybody wants to rule the world."
Could the lyrics have been any more true? Jude was 34. Jude was in a dead end job. Jude was cruising the interstate to get to his hometown. Jude's father was leaving this world. Jude felt lost. Jude had no one he felt he could turn to.
To start with, he just lost his third engagement. Maybe it was time for a new ring. Maybe it was time to decide what to do with his life. He'd studied music to start out with in college. Very soon he realized that he wasn't cut out for anything that required discipline. He merely wanted a good job. Who didn't, right? Now, working as salesman in a music store in a strip mall, he realized that he could do better. Apparently three women in his life had thought that as well. They all gave the same reason for breaking things off.
"You don't know where you're going."
Katie, the last love to leave, added another thought. "It's too hard to love someone who doesn't love himself."
"I do love myself!!!" Jude thought as his right foot grew heavier upon the accelerator. But, that was a lie. He desired a complete degree. He wanted someone to love him. He longed for steady and challenging employment that paid well. Jude wanted fulfillment.
That was all.
The sun dipped and Jude adjusted the visor. A photo fell into his lap and drifted to the floorboard. Jude leaned forward and with his calloused fingertips teased the photo nearer. He grasped it and the wheel slipped for a moment. His Cavalier swerved into the rumble strip. Jude's life flashed before his eyes as he tossed the photo aside and took the wheel in both hands.
The car lurched to a halt, a billowing cloud of dust enveloping the car. Jude lay his head on the steering wheel and cursed. He flopped back against the seat, his lungs doing all they could to supply his heart with more oxygen. The photo was on the seat next to him and he picked it up again. "What was so important that I would nearly kill myself" he thought.
It was Jude in the photo. He had a smile, something rarely seen with him these days. He was on the hood of his Cavalier with two close friends from high school. They were all about 25 in the still frame. James, the suit on the left side of the photo, was now an entrepreneur. He finished his masters in business and created a small chain of specialty chocolate shops in the northeast corner of the U.S. The other friend, Josh, was an electrician who lived in the suburbs with his wife and three kids.
Then there is Jude. He's still got the same car, the same job, the same marital status and the same bleak outlook.
"I've got to finish school. I've got to find a wife. I need a better job. A new car. A new apartment. How about a new life?!?"
He thought about James and Josh. James was doing well, but was still single. He never seemed to mind, though. He always said, "The right girl will show up and they'll both know it. Until then, I've got a life to live."
Josh's life was very modest. His wife worked part time as a substitute teacher while he did contract electrical work. He wasn't wealthy in any worldly sense. They got by.
Then Jude saw himself for what he was. In the dust cloud of his spin out the light of epiphany shone brightly. No woman would ever make Jude happy. No job would ever make life enjoyable. No money, no car, no thing could change life for Jude. The only thing in the world preventing Jude from realizing he had all he needed was Jude.
Meek is an outdated word for us, but we would do well to learn it. It means showing patience and humility. The two hardest things for people to have are part of what Jesus tells us will make us blessed. Patience and humility are necessary to get through any set of goals. You have to work to get through school. You have to wait for the right partner to come along. You must build wealth of one kind or another over time. You have to start at the bottom. Realizing that will change your outlook on life.
Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. The truly meek don't want the earth. They do realize that they have all they need right where they are, and all they need are the things that can't be bought.